Choose a Life

Choose a Life

By Carlos Maldonado, Class of 2013

Winston-Salem, North Carolina

They shall be My people, and I will be their God,

for they shall return to Me with their whole heart. Jeremiah 24:7b

            The screams of the crowd battled with the music coming from the stage, creating a beautiful mess of noise. However none of the shouts were for the band. Both the crowd and the band were praising the God of all Kings. I was also in the crowd--singing my heart out for the God who loved me.

            When I got home from that "Jesus high" I went right back to my sinful routine, as if nothing had changed. I was never aware of the huge contradiction between my life in a really spiritual place, and my everyday life. That is, until recently.

            I had gone to a seminar that highlighted some big points in my life that I needed to change. I made a commitment to do what God wanted me to do, to stop these sins. But as always, a week or two passed by and I was back in the same routine. But something was different this time. I actually saw that my commitment and my actions were not lining up. Then, one by one, all of my other failures came to mind.

            I was tired of living that double life. I understood that God accepts us while we are sinful if we are willing to change, but I did not think that I wanted to change. I had that double life because I enjoyed both the sin and the time with God. I could not have both though, and I had to choose just one life. I knew that God would help me change and become wholly His if I chose Him. I also knew that choosing the sin would end in many bad consequences and ultimately nonexistence. I made the right choice.

            Unfortunately, I am still not there; my life is not completely God-filled. Day by day I still need to, with God's help, resist temptation. It is a struggle, but I am determined to return to God with all of my heart, not a single part of it looking for sin.